Hokkien Jokes
Ah Lian called Ah Beng over the telephone.
Lian: " Beng, I can't get my new jig saw puzzle fixed, mah-chiam all the edges cannot fix together, leh."
Beng: " Jig saw puzzle si mi picture, ha?"
Lian: " The box show a big rooster, kanna like the one in talkingcock.com ".
Beng: "Okay, lah, okay, lah. I come over to hepchu, lah."
Ah Beng arrives at Ah Lian's place, where she happily leads him to the kitchen table where the jigsaw puzzle is. Ah Beng examines the puzzle and says, "Kan ni na, put back the corn flakes into the box, lah."
Dr. Quek made a routine house call to Mr. Lim, one of his elderly patients. He asks, "And how are you doing today, Mr. Lim?" Mr. Lim replies, "I feel just fine, doc.But you know, it's the strangest thing. Every night when I get up to pang jio,the bathroom light goes on for me automatically when I open the door!"
The doctor is worried that the old man is getting senile, so he phones the man's son, and the son's wife answers. The doctor tells her, "Mrs.Lim, I'm a little concerned about your father-in-law. It seems that when he gets up to urinate at night and opens the bathroom door, the light somehow goes on... " At which point, Mrs. Lim yells, "Ah Seng! Ah Pa pang jio in the fridge again!"
QUESTION : How do you know frogs are Hokkien?
ANSWER : Because when it's cold, they go "kwah,kwah, kwah".
QUESTION : How do Hokkien prawns laugh?
ANSWER : Hae hae hae (hokkien for prawns)
QUESTION : How do Hokkien fish laugh?
ANSWER : Hee hee hee (hokkien for fish)
QUESTION : What's the difference between ang-mor and Hokkien fairy Tales?
ANSWER : Ang-mor fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." and Hokkien fairy tales begin with "Lim Peh ka li kong..."
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