More Sex Jokes
SEX jOkEs
(1)
4 miracles of a woman:
- getting wet without taking a shower
- bleeding without getting hurt
- giving milk without eating grass
- and making boneless flesh hard.
(2)
A man bumps into a woman and says "So sorry ma'am. If your heart is as soft as your breasts, you will forgive me "
The lady replies: "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I am in room 603"
(3)
Q : How do the Talibans seduce their women?
A : First they attack their twin towers, then they crash into their pentagon.
(4)
Girls reaction to penis sizes:
9" - oh shit pain!
7" - oh yes, yum!
6" - oh perfect!
5" - mmm ok!
4" - push more
3" - is it in?
2" - idiot! Just use your tongue.
(5)
Ever wondered why ABCDEF are used to define bra sizes?
A - Airport (flat)
B - Barely there
C - Can do
D - Damn good
E - Enormous
F - Fake
(6)
During pregnancy:
The 1st three months, do it the normalstyle.
Next three months do it the doggy style.
And the last three months do it the wolf style. sit outside the hole and howl.
(7)
What did Newton's dick say to him after seeing a nude woman?
"Fuck you and your law of gravity, I'm going UP."
(8)
Man was sobbing in a bar. His friend asked 'why?'
He said: "my wife makes me pay $ 100/- for every Fuck!"
Friend said: "you're lucky, she charges others $ 250/-"
(9)
Lady scolds her maid for inefficiency.
Angry maid says, " at least I am better than you in bed."
Lady (amazed): "Did boss tell you this?"
Maid: "No, the driver did."
(10)
What is the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
"After a year, the dog is still excited to see you."
(11)
A wife complains to the doctor that her hubby is 300% impotent.
The doc asks "how 300%?"
She says: "you know about the 100%, and now he has broken his finger and burnt his tongue."
(12)
Teacher: "why buffaloes get depressed after milking?
Student: "Ma'am, if your boobs are rubbed for 2 hours & then you are left unfucked how would feel?
(13)
Policeman arrested a prostitute.
Prostitute: "I'm not selling sex!
Policeman: "Then what are you doing?"
Prostitute: "I'm selling condoms and offering free demo.
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